To Gollum
Gollum: verb
To obsessively and compulsively covet without the ability to enjoy that which you covet.
Derived from: Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings
Pip gollums toys in her crate. Every week or so, whenever I notice that her private stash in the back of her plastic kennel has grown so large that she is forced to sleep pressed up against the gate, I get down on my hands and knees to unload her wares. Here is a list of her most recent collection:
3 stainless steel bowls
3 Kongs
1 Kong-like toy
1 Twist and Treat
1 Everlasting Fun Ball
1 Bad Cuz toy (dehorned)
1 fleece off a small Wubba Toy
1 hard Nylabone (only sort we use)
1 marrow bone
1 Everlasting Fire Plug (with a thin ring of treat still left)
Note that food (something Pip enjoys at all times, in all forms, in any amount) remains in the fire plug. That proves golluming. If this was out in the livingroom, she would make short work of any deliciousness available, but once it is in her hide away, she cannot. All she can then do is watch over it, lie in front of it, ward it from imagined dangers.
Note also how many toys can be AWOL without us noticing, which means we have a lot of dog paraphernalia around. It’s an occupational hazard. So golluming is not a response to scarcity, nor is it because there is household tension over stuff. Around here there is always something for a dog to play with. My other dogs could care less about who has what. Only Pip cares. And she cares all the time. If I allowed it, it would take up her entire day.
And that’s the thing about golluming anything: it’s an inside job. The succinct definition is, anytime the item owns the owner you have golluming. Pip gollums.
--Sarah Wilson, MySmartPuppy.com
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Sarah Wilson is a pet behavior specialist, author, media personality, and a regular contributor to Wag Reflex. Sarah's books include, "Dogology", "My Smart Puppy", and "Tails from the Barkside", all available now.
Claire on February 20, 2009 at 08:06 AM
What a neat post. I haven't heard about this behavior before and you tell the story in such an interesting way. Thanks!
Cristiana on February 20, 2009 at 08:56 AM
This is a great term, and one that could apply to all kinds of hoarders, both human and animal. AND it relates to LOTR, so double great! :-D
Jennifer on February 20, 2009 at 12:08 PM
I love it! I shall have to use it - it so describes Sadie and the tennis ball obsession she has. :)
Mister Snitch on February 20, 2009 at 12:25 PM
So what does it mean 'to Yoda'? Eccentric sentence structure, in the form of a question, maybe?
swift boater on February 20, 2009 at 12:39 PM
my min pin gollums her biscuits. I will give her one and all day she will protect it. If my other dog walks by, snarls. If I look at her, snarls. Guards it all day and night, sleeps on it, licks it, loves it. 6 pound terror.
Until, when she can't stands it no more, she eats it! Shes a female dog and we know how fickle females are.
Nancy Gee on February 20, 2009 at 01:05 PM
Octomom & Angelina Jolie. How much of that dingbat's behavior is *really* about love of babies, and how much is it because she covets what AJ has.
tk on February 20, 2009 at 01:19 PM
Sounds like socialism. You want what someone else has so bad, that you don't even care if you get to use it for yourself---you just want to keep others from having it.
CR on February 20, 2009 at 02:15 PM
Not to be a total nerd -- okay, TO BE a total nerd I should point out that smauging would be a better name for this behavior. Gollum/Smeagol got great pleasure out of the one item he held onto, unlike Smaug (from The Hobbit), who hoarded many items but didn't derive any pleasure from it.
Robbins Mitchell on February 21, 2009 at 04:04 AM
Well,pardon my linguistic naivete',but I somehow got the idea that given what the media is doing to Obama,that the word 'golluming' was a synonym for 'fellating'
Robbins Mitchell on February 21, 2009 at 04:05 AM
Well,pardon my linguistic naivete',but I somehow got the idea that given what the media is doing to Obama,that the word 'golluming' was a synonym for 'fellating'
Bill Johnson on February 21, 2009 at 06:20 AM
Y'all never heard of "dog in the manger"? Kinda predates this by a few hundred years....
Sarah Wilson on February 21, 2009 at 11:57 AM
LOL... great comments. Ah... linguistically speaking all I can say is, "Ack, I hope not!"
And the "dog in the manger" is indeed old news but that is a comment about aggression directed at humans. This behavior doesn't have that aspect, closest word I've got is "coveting". Once aggression directed at humans occurs, it is then something else, IMO, and nothing I would ever joke about.
Margaret on June 15, 2009 at 07:32 PM
Well there is... "hoarding." o.O
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Not to be a total nerd -- okay, TO BE a total nerd I should point out that smauging would be a better name for this behavior.
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Pip gollums toys in her crate. Every week or so, whenever I notice that her private stash in the back of her plastic kennel has grown so large that she is forced to sleep pressed up against the gate
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